Anonymous Asked:
my bf is literally the best I can be so annoying because of my anxiety disorder + relationship anxiety (previous abusive relationship) and i say sorry like 6464561 times and he always assures me that im not going to scare him away and he still likes me and just wow. who knew good men exist because i sure as hell didnt, my first relationship was abusive so i had no idea that this kind of GOOD relationship existed and its nice

literally how I feel right now

I have never had a boy treat me this well.

It’s going to take a while, but I’m learning to not expect anger as a reaction to things like not paying attention to my phone or asking for something for myself, refusing to do something. 

I can finally relax and just be in a relationship.

Things that need to be said:

commententarybreakfast:

  1. Emotional abuse is still abuse. Body counts are not the only measure of oppression.
  2. Verbal abuse is still abuse. Different people have various amounts of emotional resources, and regardless of how privilege functions offline and in other spaces, hate speech on Tumblr can cause real damage.
  3. Check your mental health privilege. Anxiety and depression are real, and are not always obvious. Realize when what you say can be triggering, and do not dismiss people’s reactions as illegitimate just because they have other advantages.
  4. Any sort of abuse is categorically wrong. The objective is not that we all have thick skin, but that every person has a safe space that is truly safe, even though that means having separate safe spaces for different sets of people.

(via tamikaflynned)

thotnun:

Emma Watson’s response to the nude photo leak threats

thotnun:

Emma Watson’s response to the nude photo leak threats

(via cawtchlin)

Am official in relationship with boy. And I don’t feel like i want to bolt or that I’m trapped like I usually do when I commit to something. 

There’s a lot of emphasis on what I want and what I’m comfortable with, and I’m actually really surprised that he hasn’t gotten mad at me once for not communicating clearly or not wanting something. I don’t like that I have that habit, and I’m trying to unlearn it. I have to unlearn and then relearn a lot of things. 

It’s going to be a long time before I’m not wary. I’m trying very hard to take all this genuinely, but again, that’s not what I know.

Recovery is hard, but I will not let one person ruin my life. I won’t let him ruin this. I deserve to be happy. I have earned that right.

Nick and I are official now and I don’t feel like I wanna bolt, which is usually what happens after I commit to something, so I think I’m doing pretty well right now.

crotchetybushtit:

50shadesofacceptance:

superdodirty:

it ok to not be ready

Please spread this shit like wildfire. People go on and sit through the whole experience and they’re uncomfortable because they just want to please their partner and they don’t tell them that they want to stop because they are not ready. It’s okay not to be ready. 

notice here that consent is revoked without ever saying no and consent goes so far beyond yes/no!!!!!!

(via tamikaflynned)

loveisrespect:

Is cheating abuse?

At loveisrespect, we get asked this question all of the time: Is cheating abuse? Having a partner cheat on you can be a gut-wrenching, incredibly difficult experience, but only you know if its abuse.

It all depends on context. If your partner cheated on you and you are wondering if it’s an abusive act, ask yourself these questions:

  • Does your partner serially cheat on you and then blame you for their behavior?
  • Did your partner cheat on you intentionally to hurt you and do they threaten to cheat again?
  • Did your partner cheat to prove that they are more desired, worthy, etc. than you are?
  • Do you find yourself apologizing after you get upset with their behavior?
  • Does your partner also threaten you with violence, physically hurt you, call you names, try to control where you go or what you wear, criticize you or blame you for hurtful things they say or do?

If you answered ‘yes’ or even ‘maybe’ to any of these questions, you may be in an abusive relationship. Chat or call loveisrespect at 1-866-331-9474; we can help you sort through these feelings.

An important note: If it doesn’t feel right, then it’s probably not right. If your partner cheated and you don’t think you want to continue the relationship, then you don’t have to, whether the relationship is abusive or not.

(via plannedparenthood)

The lovely lady on the right is mine.

The lovely lady on the right is mine.

cawtchlin said: there is always an out. I know we can’t really talk about this but know that you always have a way out.

thanks, i really needed to be reminded of that <3

I’m trying very hard to relationship but I’m also trying very hard to protect myself. We almost had the exclusive conversation but I totally panicked because commitment means there isn’t an out.
I’m going to a therapist again next week. I’m going to try to sort out what is good relationship and what is bad, because it’s all together in the bad category.
Two years later and I’m still not okay.

thegreatnarwhalsmuffin:

sleptonshawty:

zixxie:

how all guys should react if a girl doesn’t want to.

how all girls should react if a guy doesn’t want to.

how anyone should react to anyone that doesn’t want to

(Source: theblogofeternalstench, via cawtchlin)

Boy wants to date me in spite of how messed up I am.

I think I’ll always have doubts, but it’s looking good right now.

Things with boy got too much on the sexual side and so serious conversation has to happen soon but hey there was no bullying or coercion so this is better than the last time as of right now.

I don’t want to fuck this up because I’ve been messed up.